As we heard about the story this week of Jesus’ arrest in the garden, I thought about how Peter took action because all his heart knew to do in that moment was defend, take up his sword, and stop this madness of arresting Jesus.
Little did he know that this was exactly what needed to happen. This was the prophecy told long ago that Jesus was here to fulfill. This was the defining moment where Jesus had to lay down his life and be arrested by these soldiers, and Peter’s reaction would not stop God’s plan of redemption for all humanity.
Pastor Jason shared that when Peter swung his sword at the high priest’s servant during the arrest…he was not seeing the big picture. Peter was focused on what was happening in the present, and that led him to take matters into his own hands and try to “defend” Jesus.
I wonder what he thought about when he looked back at that moment. Maybe he smiled at his younger self, who was so quick to try and change the situation in his own human strength. Maybe it filled him with a measure of shame, that he didn’t trust God’s plan from the beginning. Or maybe he looked back with the eyes of grace…knowing that at this point in time, he didn’t fully understand everything and that was ok.
I think we also struggle to see past the darkness. We find ourselves caught in an impossible circumstance, a scary diagnosis, the loss of a job or security, or the grief of saying goodbye to someone we love. The darkness feels so heavy….that we start to wonder if our hearts will ever experience “joy” again. How could joy be possible when everything is lost, and there seems to be no way out of this but through it?
I was talking with my small group this week about how difficult it can be to sit with our emotions. We try to hurry them away, numb or not think about them, distract or please ourselves with things that don’t fill us. This is where addictions are born.
It is often too hard to stare at the hurt in the face, so we do anything we can to escape it. Fight, flight or flee…this is often where the human heart lands.
I wonder what it would have looked like if Peter let the anger rise in his body in the garden, stayed present with the emotion in the moment…but waited with it instead. I wonder what would happen if the anger didn’t lead him to pull out his sword, but rather, drove him to prayer and desperation before God.
I wonder what kind of people we would be if we learned to sit with what hurts us, what makes us angry, and what causes us great anxiety….and to be near to the Lord right in the middle of those emotions.
There is no doubt that garden scene would have turned out a little different if Peter would have let his spirit submit to God instead of the flesh.
What does it take for us to see beyond our darkness and see what God is doing in a given situation? There is no easy answer to this, but I believe the first step is to simply let Him sit in the darkness with us.
Maybe there, in that quiet and dark place…we can hear Him a little more clearly. Maybe if we face the pain or the ache inside of us, He will help us begin to see the clay inside His hands that He molds and fashions it all into something entirely new.
If we don’t experience the dark…how will we ever appreciate the light?
I am deeply comforted by this verse that I sent to a hurting friend this week. Knowing that our God doesn’t see darkness the same way we do is something truly encouraging to the human soul. I pray that it comforts you as well, even in the middle of the darkness.
“…even the darkness is not dark to you; the night is bright as the day, for darkness is as light with you.”
- Psalm 139:12
Little did he know that this was exactly what needed to happen. This was the prophecy told long ago that Jesus was here to fulfill. This was the defining moment where Jesus had to lay down his life and be arrested by these soldiers, and Peter’s reaction would not stop God’s plan of redemption for all humanity.
Pastor Jason shared that when Peter swung his sword at the high priest’s servant during the arrest…he was not seeing the big picture. Peter was focused on what was happening in the present, and that led him to take matters into his own hands and try to “defend” Jesus.
I wonder what he thought about when he looked back at that moment. Maybe he smiled at his younger self, who was so quick to try and change the situation in his own human strength. Maybe it filled him with a measure of shame, that he didn’t trust God’s plan from the beginning. Or maybe he looked back with the eyes of grace…knowing that at this point in time, he didn’t fully understand everything and that was ok.
I think we also struggle to see past the darkness. We find ourselves caught in an impossible circumstance, a scary diagnosis, the loss of a job or security, or the grief of saying goodbye to someone we love. The darkness feels so heavy….that we start to wonder if our hearts will ever experience “joy” again. How could joy be possible when everything is lost, and there seems to be no way out of this but through it?
I was talking with my small group this week about how difficult it can be to sit with our emotions. We try to hurry them away, numb or not think about them, distract or please ourselves with things that don’t fill us. This is where addictions are born.
It is often too hard to stare at the hurt in the face, so we do anything we can to escape it. Fight, flight or flee…this is often where the human heart lands.
I wonder what it would have looked like if Peter let the anger rise in his body in the garden, stayed present with the emotion in the moment…but waited with it instead. I wonder what would happen if the anger didn’t lead him to pull out his sword, but rather, drove him to prayer and desperation before God.
I wonder what kind of people we would be if we learned to sit with what hurts us, what makes us angry, and what causes us great anxiety….and to be near to the Lord right in the middle of those emotions.
There is no doubt that garden scene would have turned out a little different if Peter would have let his spirit submit to God instead of the flesh.
What does it take for us to see beyond our darkness and see what God is doing in a given situation? There is no easy answer to this, but I believe the first step is to simply let Him sit in the darkness with us.
Maybe there, in that quiet and dark place…we can hear Him a little more clearly. Maybe if we face the pain or the ache inside of us, He will help us begin to see the clay inside His hands that He molds and fashions it all into something entirely new.
If we don’t experience the dark…how will we ever appreciate the light?
I am deeply comforted by this verse that I sent to a hurting friend this week. Knowing that our God doesn’t see darkness the same way we do is something truly encouraging to the human soul. I pray that it comforts you as well, even in the middle of the darkness.
“…even the darkness is not dark to you; the night is bright as the day, for darkness is as light with you.”
- Psalm 139:12
Erika Pizzo
Erika is an author of various books on the topics of faith, mental health, and victory in Christ. Erika lives with her husband, daughter, son, and their fluffy poodle in sunny Southern California. Her two favorite things are a visit to the beach and a chai latte in hand.