Can I just be honest with you for a minute and share that I was one of the people cringing in my seat as the word submission was brought up this past Sunday?
It’s not that I haven’t seen it done well…I actually really have. I’ve seen models of great authority, marriages, and partnerships that work beautifully under submission. I’ve witnessed examples where everybody moves forward in harmony because they have embraced their God-given roles. I’ve seen first-hand what a marriage looks like when the husband values and honors his wife in love as the wife submits to him as head of the household.
Rather, the problem is that I’ve also seen the “dark side” of how this all plays out. Submission gone wrong. The times where authority seemed to have been placed in the wrong hands…and the aftermath was not harmony or unity, but abuse and mistreatment, trauma and hardship.
I’ve watched leaders rise to power who simply want control, and people who blindly submit to that and take orders as if that leader were God himself.
But there was something different happening in my heart as I sat and listened this past Sunday and that big “S” word was brought up…I may have squirmed a little in my seat, but then the Holy Spirit whispered, “It’s ok Erika, this is a safe place.”
You see, when I first came to Coast Hills I had some past wounds. I had experienced leadership that was hungry for power and control, and spending almost a decade in that environment led me to have my guard up around other believers. I constantly wondered, “What is this person’s motive? Do they truly love the Lord?”
But within the first few weeks and months of meeting all the leadership at Coast Hills, God began to take down those walls one by one. He showed me the power of servant leadership…the humility I witnessed astounded me.
During this time of healing, God kept giving me this verse in 1 Peter 5:5-6:
“Likewise, you who are younger, be subject to the elders. Clothe yourselves, all of you, with humility toward one another, for “God opposes the proud but gives grace to the humble.” Humble yourselves, therefore, under the mighty hand of God so that at the proper time he may exalt you.”
Submitting to leadership becomes easier when humility and trustworthiness enter the equation.
Maybe you have experienced hurt at church in some way? Maybe you’ve been in an environment where the word submission was abused for the sake of control and mistreatment? It hurts sweet friend, I know it really hurts.
But don’t neglect the healing that God wants to do in your heart right here and right now. Yes, this church is full of broken and fallen people too…it’s something we can’t fully escape until heaven. But the humility I’ve seen among this body is truly special, and it would be a shame to keep your walls up when God has redemptive work to do in your heart and life on the other side.
He plans to heal the things that were once broken.
It’s ok to trust Him again.
It’s ok to believe that He can pick up all those broken pieces and give you a future, even hope in whatever He has next.
I’m cheering for you as you tear down those walls, from one wounded and broken person to the next…we can do this, only by His strength.
It’s not that I haven’t seen it done well…I actually really have. I’ve seen models of great authority, marriages, and partnerships that work beautifully under submission. I’ve witnessed examples where everybody moves forward in harmony because they have embraced their God-given roles. I’ve seen first-hand what a marriage looks like when the husband values and honors his wife in love as the wife submits to him as head of the household.
Rather, the problem is that I’ve also seen the “dark side” of how this all plays out. Submission gone wrong. The times where authority seemed to have been placed in the wrong hands…and the aftermath was not harmony or unity, but abuse and mistreatment, trauma and hardship.
I’ve watched leaders rise to power who simply want control, and people who blindly submit to that and take orders as if that leader were God himself.
But there was something different happening in my heart as I sat and listened this past Sunday and that big “S” word was brought up…I may have squirmed a little in my seat, but then the Holy Spirit whispered, “It’s ok Erika, this is a safe place.”
You see, when I first came to Coast Hills I had some past wounds. I had experienced leadership that was hungry for power and control, and spending almost a decade in that environment led me to have my guard up around other believers. I constantly wondered, “What is this person’s motive? Do they truly love the Lord?”
But within the first few weeks and months of meeting all the leadership at Coast Hills, God began to take down those walls one by one. He showed me the power of servant leadership…the humility I witnessed astounded me.
During this time of healing, God kept giving me this verse in 1 Peter 5:5-6:
“Likewise, you who are younger, be subject to the elders. Clothe yourselves, all of you, with humility toward one another, for “God opposes the proud but gives grace to the humble.” Humble yourselves, therefore, under the mighty hand of God so that at the proper time he may exalt you.”
Submitting to leadership becomes easier when humility and trustworthiness enter the equation.
Maybe you have experienced hurt at church in some way? Maybe you’ve been in an environment where the word submission was abused for the sake of control and mistreatment? It hurts sweet friend, I know it really hurts.
But don’t neglect the healing that God wants to do in your heart right here and right now. Yes, this church is full of broken and fallen people too…it’s something we can’t fully escape until heaven. But the humility I’ve seen among this body is truly special, and it would be a shame to keep your walls up when God has redemptive work to do in your heart and life on the other side.
He plans to heal the things that were once broken.
It’s ok to trust Him again.
It’s ok to believe that He can pick up all those broken pieces and give you a future, even hope in whatever He has next.
I’m cheering for you as you tear down those walls, from one wounded and broken person to the next…we can do this, only by His strength.
Erika Pizzo
Erika is an author of various books on the topics of faith, mental health, and victory in Christ. She also hosts the weekly podcast “Temple Care” where she provides regular messages of encouragement. Erika lives with her husband, daughter, son, and their fluffy poodle in sunny Southern California. Her two favorite things are a visit to the beach and a chai latte in hand.